{"id":218,"date":"2025-05-12T20:48:38","date_gmt":"2025-05-12T17:48:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/?p=218"},"modified":"2025-11-15T21:19:23","modified_gmt":"2025-11-15T18:19:23","slug":"adini-bile-hatirlamadigim-bir-seyi-bekliyorum","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/adini-bile-hatirlamadigim-bir-seyi-bekliyorum.html","title":{"rendered":"Ad\u0131n\u0131 Bile Hat\u0131rlamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m Bir \u015eeyi Bekliyorum"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Baz\u0131 bekleyi\u015fler vard\u0131r&#8230; Birinin gelmesini de\u011fil, bir \u015feyin olmas\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fil; sadece i\u00e7imizdeki o belirsiz bo\u015flu\u011fun dolmas\u0131n\u0131 bekleriz. Ama tam olarak neyi bekledi\u011fimizi bilmeden.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sadece zaman ge\u00e7er. Takvim yapraklar\u0131 de\u011fi\u015fir, mevsimler d\u00f6ner, \u00e7evrendeki insanlar ba\u015fka hayatlara kar\u0131\u015f\u0131r. Ama sen h\u00e2l\u00e2 ayn\u0131 yerde, ayn\u0131 histe, ayn\u0131 yar\u0131m kalm\u0131\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7indesindir. <strong>Bir \u015fey eksiktir.<\/strong> Ne oldu\u011funu tan\u0131mlayamazs\u0131n ama onun yoklu\u011fu seni her g\u00fcn biraz daha a\u011f\u0131rla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ve bekledik\u00e7e\u2026 unutursun. Kimi bekliyordun, neden bekliyordun, neyin hayalini kurmu\u015ftun\u2026 Zaman, haf\u0131zan\u0131n kenarlar\u0131n\u0131 siler. \u00d6nce kimi bekledi\u011fini unutursun, sonra neyi bekledi\u011fini. <strong>Ama beklemek kal\u0131r. O h\u00e2l\u00e2 oradad\u0131r.<\/strong>  Ad\u0131 olmayan, y\u00f6n\u00fc olmayan, sebebi olmayan bir bekleyi\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p>Beklemek, yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n en sessiz h\u00e2lidir. Bir kahve so\u011fur masanda, bir \u015fark\u0131 \u00e7alar ge\u00e7er, bir mektup asla yaz\u0131lmaz. Ve sen t\u00fcm bunlar\u0131 fark edemeyecek kadar \u201cbir \u015feyin\u201d olmas\u0131n\u0131 beklersin. Belki bir mesaj, belki bir tesad\u00fcf, belki de sadece bir \u201ciyi misin?\u201d Ama gelmez. Ve sen, o gelmedik\u00e7e biraz daha kendinden uzakla\u015f\u0131rs\u0131n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Bir g\u00fcn aynaya bakars\u0131n. Ve tan\u0131mazs\u0131n kendini. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc sen art\u0131k sen de\u011filsindir. Beklemek seni ba\u015fka bir \u015feye d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcr.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>G\u00fcnler ge\u00e7tik\u00e7e, sadece \u201cbekleyen biri\u201d h\u00e2line gelirsin. Bir kimlik de\u011fil, bir eylem. Bir varl\u0131k de\u011fil, bir h\u00e2l. Bekleyen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>O y\u00fczden insan en \u00e7ok neyi bekledi\u011fini hat\u0131rlad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda ac\u0131r can\u0131. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc o zaman anlar ki: Sadece beklememi\u015ftir. <strong>Kendini yava\u015f yava\u015f b\u0131rakm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Can Ozan - A\u011flama Ben A\u011flar\u0131m (Live @ Bostanc\u0131 G\u00f6steri Merkezi 2024)\" width=\"660\" height=\"371\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/-2HR0ZWzdS8?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Baz\u0131 bekleyi\u015fler vard\u0131r&#8230; Birinin gelmesini de\u011fil, bir \u015feyin olmas\u0131n\u0131 de\u011fil; sadece i\u00e7imizdeki o belirsiz bo\u015flu\u011fun dolmas\u0131n\u0131 bekleriz. Ama tam olarak neyi bekledi\u011fimizi bilmeden. Sadece zaman ge\u00e7er. Takvim yapraklar\u0131 de\u011fi\u015fir, mevsimler d\u00f6ner, \u00e7evrendeki insanlar ba\u015fka hayatlara kar\u0131\u015f\u0131r. Ama sen h\u00e2l\u00e2 ayn\u0131 yerde, ayn\u0131 histe, ayn\u0131 yar\u0131m kalm\u0131\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7indesindir. Bir \u015fey eksiktir. Ne oldu\u011funu tan\u0131mlayamazs\u0131n ama onun &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/adini-bile-hatirlamadigim-bir-seyi-bekliyorum.html\" class=\"more-link\">Okumaya devam et <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Ad\u0131n\u0131 Bile Hat\u0131rlamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m Bir \u015eeyi Bekliyorum<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":219,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[61,59,58],"class_list":["post-218","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-kisisel","tag-ayni-his","tag-ayni-yer","tag-bekliyorum"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=218"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":368,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/218\/revisions\/368"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/219"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=218"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=218"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mustafaalniak.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=218"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}